The Future

So now that school has started back across our area everyone is getting back into the swing of things including me. I have class lectures on Monday and Wednesday at UAB and then I have a clinical rotation for community health on Tuesdays. Where we go on Tuesdays varies because it is community so we go where ever the community needs volunteer nurses. So far it is has been a sort of boring experience but hopefully it will get better the more I get to volunteer!

But with schools starting and college classes beginning I can't help but think of Tuscaloosa and the University of Alabama. I miss it very much. I think to myself  what I wouldn't give to be a student on that campus again. I know that it is hard to understand and its even harder to explain. I feel like my heart lies there; NOT at UAB. I know that I am getting a wonderful education by very skilled and intelligent instructors but I can't help but wish I was at UA instead. I honestly feel that it was where I was meant to be. It is everything that I dreamed it would be in high school and more. I loved it. Sometimes I feel disappointed in myself for not trying harder while I was there. I thought I was doing the best that I could and maybe I was but today it feels like I could have done more and maybe I would have gotten in. That phone call from their college of nursing offering me a spot was one the happiest and saddest days of my life because I had to tell them no.

Don't get me wrong, I am very happy I got in at UAB and I have made wonderful friends and I know I am receiving a great education but doesn't everyone think about what might have been? What would things be like? What would it feel like to walk across the stage at Coleman Coliseum and get my diploma? I will only know what it feels like to wear an ugly green robe for UAB.

Its hard to fully explain how I feel and maybe it doesn't make any sense but lately it has been weighing on me and I needed to vent. Thanks for listening! ha

But one thing I can still look forward to from UA is football. This Saturday is our first game against Kent State and I couldn't be any more excited! RTR!

----post again soon